Think the country is becoming too dumb? I have a solution!!!

Originally Posted Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Well my congregation, having taken a rather long sabbatical from posting new sermons, the reverend has returned! This time, he talks about a subject that could, potentially, save the population of the entire country-nay, the entire world!!!

As I'm sure most of you have noticed, the United States on average is becoming dumber and dumber every year. Yes, you're not the only one who's noticed. The reason you're not the only one is because it is really happening! But never fear my children, as always, the Rev has the answer: Forced sterilization of morons!!

Since we can't just go around randomly killing people for being complete asshats, we can do the next best thing: make sure they don't reproduce. You all know the people i'm talking about too, you see them on TV everyday, in real life, and around the office. Those peole that you look at, and say, "Dear God, I hope he never has kids" or "I feel so sorry for her children!!". The big problem is that these are the people who are most likely to reproduce. If you doubt me, watch the movie "Idiocracy" by Mike Judge, and tell me that you don't see that happen every day.

The movie starts out with a cross section of two american families. One of them is a couple, recently married, husband has an IQ of 148 and the wife has an IQ of 152. Then it flashed to Cletus, IQ of 81. Cletus lives in a trailer park. As of the time of the cross section, he already has 3 children. During the interview, his wife runs out of the house with a positive pregnancy test, while simultaneously the neighbor comes out and announces that she is also pregnant with Cletus' child. We also find out his daughter is pregnant. Now, fast forward 5 years. Cletus currently has 8 children and at least 5 grand children. The intelligent couple thought about having a child, but decided the market wasn't right and it'd be a shame to bring a child into the world at this time. This pattern continues til eventually, the husband dies, and Cletus has 12 children, 20 grandchildren, and a few great grandchildren, and all of them are idiots. Tell me you can't see something like that happening in real life. I dare ya!!

Don't believe me? Sure you do. You just don't want to admit it!! These are the same people who are trying to support a family of 5 on a minimum wage salary, or think it's a brilliant idea to spend more money on rims than they did on the car they're going on, and then wonder why they're constantly broke!! These are the same people who spout out that "things need to be better" without actually giving any solutions for how to accomplish this. Women who get everything based on their looks, but get confused when someone asks them what their address is!!

Now, the question everybody is wondering, is how do we determine who gets to reproduce? Fear not, the Rev has thought about this!! It's so simple, I don't know why no one's ever thought of it before!!! I will decide who gets to reproduce!!! As a man of God, I have divine authority to determine this!!

Don't like that idea? Well, you're off the list of those allowed. Fine, here's another solution: we come up with a set of factors including IQ, a fairly empirical personality profile, violent crime tendencies, severe mental disorders, and finally a psychological evaluation. A panel of expert psychologists then determines whether a person is qualified to reproduce. These tests are to be administered as soon as a person turns 18.

"But Rev, kids can still reproduce when they're in High School and even Junior High! How do we stop the dumbass jock from breeding with airhead cheerleaders??" It's simple. Once a girl reaches age 12, she is immediately put on birth control. Not a pill based birth control, one which is out of the control of the person, thereby leaving nothing to chance.

My plan, if followed correctly, will put an end to several problems beyond simply the problem of idiots being allowed to breed. It will also solve the problem of teen pregnancy, which is always a major concern, it will help solve the overpopulation problem, and finally it will help to put an end to the major problem of girl's faking a pregnancy in order to force a guy to marry her (hopefully these psychos will be caught by a screener). All in all, I believe this is a fairly solid plan.

SO, my congregation, let's all say a prayer that our gov't will realize the error of allowing people who should not have children to reproduce, and step in to stop this from happening any further. Let us pray my children. Thank you

**NOTE: If not enough of the intelligent girls are hot, some dumb hot ones may be exempted from the rule to keep the overall population from getting ugly as necessary**

**NOTE 2: This sermon was not directed at a particular person, just a particular group of people. Idiots. If you think you belong in that group, there's a strong chance you do. If you think you don't belong in the group, there's a stronger chance you do.**

In Nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen.

Original Comments

Well, notice that I said "Severe" mental disorders; specifically ones where a person is either a: a threat to themselves and/or others, or B: their illess is so severe that they need constant surveillance. I include these because mental illness tends to be passed down genetically. I'm not saying if someone has ADD or Dyslexia they're sterilized. Sorry for the mix up!!
Posted by THE Reverend Jim on Wednesday, July 25, 2007 - 2:05 PM

I like it.. now how do we get it on the ballots?
Posted by ~*iceystars*~ on Wednesday, July 25, 2007 - 2:31 PM

Humorous as always, but I'm not sure that I would be willing to trade away a freedom in exchange for a reduction in the number of idiots. Very tempting, mind you, but I don't think I want the government (itself reeking of idiots) to be in charge of something like this...
Posted by the RBEEC on Wednesday, July 25, 2007 - 4:48 PM

I actually support this idea. Although there are some loopholes, I think it would greatly clear up some of the unneccessary overpopulation of the country. We too many idiots alive now to allow them to continue breeding unchecked.
Posted by Jessi on Wednesday, July 25, 2007 - 7:24 PM

The only disadvantages to this plan is that nobody with a brain will want to live under reproductive fascism, leading to a massive brain-drain, and the ultimate collapse of the national IQ. Another problem is a loss of service sector workers, leading to the collapse of food, trash, and sanitation. But other than that it sounds like a winner.
Posted by d on Saturday, December 15, 2007 - 4:28 PM